There’s a phrase people love to use whenever someone speaks honestly about their childhood experience: “Your parent(s) did the best they could.” Many parents are raising children while carrying their own wounds, their own trauma, and their own lack of healthy examples. They parent from the only framework they know.…
-
-
One of the quiet shifts in healing is realizing how much energy is spent searching for validation—especially from the people who shaped us. For a long time, I believed that if I could just explain myself clearly enough, someone would finally see me. Understand. Acknowledge the harm. Confirm that my…
-
I carried a deep, quiet shame because of my divorce. Not because God placed it there—but because people did. Somewhere along the way, I absorbed the lie that if God hates divorce, then He must be angry with me. That my story disqualified me. That my broken marriage made me…
-
I have a friend who is currently separated from her husband of more than twenty years. They share two sons, and in the wake of the separation, those sons have taken to resenting their mother for leaving their father. It’s heartbreaking to witness—not only because of the fractured family dynamic,…
-
Something that has had my blood boiling more than once this past year is this: From a young age, so many little girls were taught that quietness equaled goodness. That being polite meant never disagreeing. That “children should be seen and not heard.” And without realizing it, those words planted…
-
For much of my life, I believed that love and belonging were things I had to earn. I thought if I just tried hard enough—if I reached out, checked in, stayed available, and proved my loyalty—then the people I cared about would stay. Deep down, I was afraid of being…
-
One of the most painful lessons many of us learn in life is this: not everyone has the same heart as you. Just because you love people deeply doesn’t mean they will love you the same way in return. Just because you go out of your way to show kindness,…
-
Have you ever had dreams about past relationships—ones that weren’t even that meaningful, but for some reason they keep resurfacing? Recently, I found myself dreaming about old boyfriends. Not because I miss them, or because I secretly want them back, but because my heart is still working through what they…
-
I’ve allowed judgment from people who were never even part of my upbringing or my story. Somewhere along the way, I allowed people’s opinions to define me. I let their words settle in my spirit, and believed lies that had no foundation in truth. The truth is, more often than…
-
My father used to call me “well adjusted.” I suppose, in his eyes, I was the ideal daughter—quiet, respectful, non-confrontational. I never talked back; smiled through everything; and held my tongue when I wanted to scream. What my father never realized, though, was that there was a storm brewing inside…